Quiet birthday
My birthday passed yesterday. Very quiet, almost no one realized it. The only ones that remembered were my family and friends that I've not spoken to in a while. It was a relief not to have to bother too much about divulging what my birthday plans were etc because simply I just had none. I didn't mind not celebrating but somehow when I told my family I had no plans for my birthday, they all kept at it like I was some sad, lonely girl ... huh? Granted I'm single but I've never celebrated my birthdays with any of my boyfriends anyway ... what's the big deal? Does this mean that a girl on her own MUST have a special boyfriend especially on those special days so that she won't be deemed as miserable? Heck, I just don't feel like celebrating especially because it's during the working week.
Miserable? Haven't been so for awhile ... I've got Africa projects to figure out and economic models to master. There's simply no reason and no time to be miserable ... besides, this is kl ... there are lots of other things to do. If in Kuching, I probably would be bored out of my mind and getting a boyfriend just to have someone to pass the time with. But that's not really my style. In KL, finding someone that my family could actually consider is hard enough, what more someone that can click with me. Stressful to put such demands on myself. Making new friends and keeping in touch with old ones are all I'm doing right now. Not looking for anyone special. So if it happens, it happens. I know this sounds pathetic but somehow I find more joy trying to figure out the roads and short-cut routes in KL than to get a boyfriend. Have car will travel, I guess. Free as a bird. A friend of mine remarked yesterday that it will be lonely not to have someone but I guess he hasn't been through a long-distance relationship. You're lonely all the time with the added wariness of not being too "inviting" to others to avoid mixed signals.
For the first time in my life, I don't like going for a course. It's a 3-week course in March and because of that I'm missing an opportunity to do an international project and enhancing my software skills. But trying to look at the brighter side ... I'll have some basics to actually perform well for my Africa projects ... fingers-crossed :) Still don't like losing out on interesting stuff, though. My boss thinks I might still be around next year ... wonder if she knows that I'm planning to go for my masters then it will be goodbye to my department. If people pass that masters program, they'll immediately be taken into another department to fill up the vacancies. Don't need to tell her anyway... will just inform my new bosses of my plans. I pretty much miss my 2 close pals who are undergoing that masters program now. Will be nice to work together with them again. Sometimes it's hard to find someone you can click with at work too. Gosh, miss them ... my partners-in-crime. Now, who said that guys and girls can never be just friends?
Miserable? Haven't been so for awhile ... I've got Africa projects to figure out and economic models to master. There's simply no reason and no time to be miserable ... besides, this is kl ... there are lots of other things to do. If in Kuching, I probably would be bored out of my mind and getting a boyfriend just to have someone to pass the time with. But that's not really my style. In KL, finding someone that my family could actually consider is hard enough, what more someone that can click with me. Stressful to put such demands on myself. Making new friends and keeping in touch with old ones are all I'm doing right now. Not looking for anyone special. So if it happens, it happens. I know this sounds pathetic but somehow I find more joy trying to figure out the roads and short-cut routes in KL than to get a boyfriend. Have car will travel, I guess. Free as a bird. A friend of mine remarked yesterday that it will be lonely not to have someone but I guess he hasn't been through a long-distance relationship. You're lonely all the time with the added wariness of not being too "inviting" to others to avoid mixed signals.
For the first time in my life, I don't like going for a course. It's a 3-week course in March and because of that I'm missing an opportunity to do an international project and enhancing my software skills. But trying to look at the brighter side ... I'll have some basics to actually perform well for my Africa projects ... fingers-crossed :) Still don't like losing out on interesting stuff, though. My boss thinks I might still be around next year ... wonder if she knows that I'm planning to go for my masters then it will be goodbye to my department. If people pass that masters program, they'll immediately be taken into another department to fill up the vacancies. Don't need to tell her anyway... will just inform my new bosses of my plans. I pretty much miss my 2 close pals who are undergoing that masters program now. Will be nice to work together with them again. Sometimes it's hard to find someone you can click with at work too. Gosh, miss them ... my partners-in-crime. Now, who said that guys and girls can never be just friends?
posted by Marg @ 7:23 PM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home